Apples and Oranges!

LGBTQ communities all over have been suppressed by society for too long. This suppressed emotional volcano finally erupted in the last few years. And it is now burning everything in it’s path. Without consideration.

I experienced this first-hand during Fremont Unified School District’s (FUSD) open session on March 14, 2018, where I went to voice my opinion against the new Sexual education syllabus introduced this year.

I guess some background is in order.

The opposition to this new syllabus was centered around one basic premise. To borrow a phrase from that meeting, the details are ‘developmentally inappropriate for kids’. A few examples:

• At age 9/10 (Grade 4), girls will learn about ‘nocturnal emission in boys’
• At age 10/11 (Grade 5), students will hear sentences like ‘if the male and female have sexual intercourse then the penis is inserted into the vagina’
• At age 12/13 (Grade 7), students may discuss anal sex
• At age 9/10 (Grade 4), a girl will be encouraged to introduce herself as a ‘person born with ovaries/vulva/vagina’ and a boy will be encouraged to introduce himself as a ‘person born with testicles and penis’

I don’t know about you, but this is not the level of detail I’d willing expose my kid to. Not at that age. I felt obliged to show up to protest at the FUSD board meeting and sign the petition highlighting this issue. (It has gathered over 4300 online signatures so far.)

My guess is that someone interpreted the petition as an effort to discourage gender-inclusive education. (Or maybe the petition could have been worded better? But I digress, so let me get back on topic.) Word spread, and our LGBT community gathered in full force to oppose the petitioners at the same board meeting.

That’s the background, with some speculation towards the end.

As I sat through the board meeting’s open-session, I watched our LGBTQ community express their support for gender-inclusive sexual education. Parents, teachers, students, social workers, ACLU lawyers – an impressive and intimidating display of speakers reasoning why gender-inclusive education is necessary.

And I watched concerned parents including me highlighting why they believe some content of the proposed syllabus was developmentally inappropriate.

Here’s where it got interesting - not a single person opposing the new curriculum expressed any reservations about the gender-inclusiveness. Their focus was on making the syllabus age-appropriate. At the same time, not a single person supporting gender-inclusive education talked about age-appropriateness. Their focus was on making sure the curriculum stays gender-inclusive.

It’s like two separate issues were being discussed - apples and oranges!

Parents had little scope to make their point, and were steamrolled by the overwhelming LGBT support. Board members did not seem likely to take on the likes of ACLU.

A seemingly realistic and fair parent request – one that had absolutely nothing to do with gender-inclusive education - was buried in the aftermath of this proverbial volcano!

Ironically, I believe this will prove detrimental for the very cause the supporters were rooting for. There is no way I’m going to knowingly send my kid to a sex-Ed class that goes into such depth – not at age 10. For those small pieces of unacceptable detail, my kid is missing out on a huge piece of excellent instruction. Inclusive instruction. Instruction that includes teaching respect to everyone in the gender spectrum.

And I guarantee I’m not the only parent who feels so.

I believe there is a very simple way forward. Let’s both groups sit across the table with FUSD folks, and hash this out. As long as the age-inappropriateness is addressed, and the gender-inclusiveness is preserved, all concerned parties can go home happy.

Or am I missing something here?

This is not an ‘us versus them’. We are all in this together. We are here to do right by the kids. Let’s do this right!

These are my personal views. I do not speak for any group or organization.